It’s not that the grief gets ‘better’ just more tolerable; how much hurt can you hold today? Some days it’s debilitatingly more than others. Some days I drift off into a memory and shake my head to come out of it to get back to the present. How can I explain I was thinking of… a cat?

The first year of loss we go through these milestones. I thought he and Lucy would have 17, 18 birthdays together but just two months after their 14th he was gone. And she’s been alone but she’s thriving.

Half my heart is with me, earthside. My other half has made a couple of visits and for that I’m so grateful. Lucy and I are listening.