Last year I wasn’t ready to set up an ofrenda for Linus but this year I felt called to ask for him to visit me. Last year at this time I didn’t want to live without him, didn’t want to be alive at all; it’s a little better now. Sometimes he appears in my dreams…

To fashion an inner story of our pain carries us into the heart of it, which is where rebirth inevitably occurs. -Sue Monk Kidd Unlike his passing, I knew this day was coming. The seasons have changed, milestones have come and gone: the first Halloween without matching costumes, the first solo Christmas card, the first…

The one year anniversary of the worst day of my life is coming up. I’ve dreamt of Linus twice in the last two weeks. I want to believe that he knows how hard it’ll be for me and has been appearing to reassure me. – – – Last night’s dream: I came home. We’re out…

It’s the 25th of the month. Maybe that won’t stand out to me as much after the first year or maybe it always will, who knows. It’s been 11 months without him. I haven’t seen or heard him recently, he hasn’t been in my dreams. I miss him. Sometimes I even get angry with him…

It’s not that the grief gets ‘better’ just more tolerable; how much hurt can you hold today? Some days it’s debilitatingly more than others. Some days I drift off into a memory and shake my head to come out of it to get back to the present. How can I explain I was thinking of……