Six months without him. Half a year since I said goodbye and he left me. The hardest day, the worst days. His visit in my dream helped me so much though and for the first time today I looked at his altar and smiled. It was such a gift to be with him again, if…

Linus was in my dreams last night. He hadn’t appeared to me yet but I kept waiting, asking. In the dream, my parents and I are in my old condo – they’re rummaging through the other rooms, not sure what they were doing. Linus and I are in the dining room, he’s on the table…

It’s almost six months following his death and every day I look at his pictures or paintings and think: I killed him I burned him I made his fur and bones into ash if I add water can I create clay and bring him back to life or maybe the dust he’ll reappear like a…

Four months today without him. It hasn’t gotten easier or softer or better. I miss him more than life.

The necklace I’m wearing in the pics is a gift from a friend. It’s a beautiful locket with a picture of Linus and the words: “if love could have saved you, you would have lived forever” He was there with us a little bit for the first holiday pics with just two of us.